If a horror movie is worth a damn, you inevitably have victims that you wish would have survived. Maybe you connected with the character in some way, maybe they were sympathetic, maybe you just think the death they received was gratuitous or especially horrible. Hell, maybe you just think they are attractive and hope for an appearance in the sequel. Whatever the reason: you want them to survive, but they didn't. So I thought it might be fun to go through several of the franchises I own and pick out who I would save. And what better to start with then the most prolific of the horror movie franchises (give or take Hellraiser)? So, without further ado, here is the character I would save from each of the twelve Friday the 13th films.
Friday the 13th: Brenda
This was a hard one: there are at least three that I would spare from their fates: Annie, who was just excited to cook for and work with kids and Bill, who just seemed like a solid guy, were the other two I considered. But for me, Brenda strikes me as the most unfair of the kills in the first movie. Mrs. Voorhees is punishing the counselors for not protecting Jason, but she kills Brenda who runs out into a storm (in her nightgown!) when she hears a child crying for help? If anything, Brenda should have been deliberately spared - it's not like the camp was going to open with the five other murders that had already occurred. Brenda deserved better! Also: how often is a non-nerd character shown just reading for fun in a horror movie?
Friday the 13th Part II: Vickie
This one was fairly easy: Vickie is a sweetheart and the gusto with which she pursues Mark (pictured above with her) is probably the most relatable subplot from amongst the doomed counselors. She at least gets to last the longest of those left behind.
As an aside, I think most people would pick Mark since it kind of sucks to be stuck in a wheelchair with a murderer stalking about, but I kind of appreciate the chutzpah of killing him - given the period in which the film was made, it feels slightly taboo, particularly with how graphic it is compared to the other deaths.
Friday the 13th Part III: Vera
Vera gets the shit end of the stick. The first of the main group to get killed (though Shelly is the first to encounter Jason, he lives long enough to die in front of Chili), she's an add-on brought along to potentially hook up with Shelly. Even then, when she very kindly turns him down, he still calls her a bitch. She's even trying to get some of Shelly's stuff that fell into the lake out when Jason comes along and kills her. Vera deserved better.
Friday the 13th: The Final Chapter: Mrs. Jarvis
Another character done dirty. Mrs. Jarvis lives on the lake with her two children - why does Jason suddenly go after them? Is it because of the teens next door? That isn't her fault! Plus, it sucks that our final two - Trish and Tommy Jarvis - are orphans at the end of the movie. Plus, she doesn't even get an onscreen death or even an acknowledgement of it during the movie.
Friday the 13th: A New Beginning: George
I was tempted to go with Joey, if only because preventing his death would have saved the entire cast, but that feels a bit like cheating. Instead, I'll go with George, the grandfather of Reggie who seems like such an odd kill. Granted, almost all of Roy's kills don't make sense (Vic, the one who kills Joey, is ironically one of the few survivors of Roy's rampage), but for all appearances, George was very kind and helpful to all of the troubled kids, so killing him seems more like increasing the body count than out of any real motivation for Roy.
Honorable mention to Vinnie and Pete, who I have as a gay couple in my head-canon. They were just passing by, no reason to murder them.
Friday the 13th Part VI: Jason Lives: Lizabeth
This one was an easy call: Lizbeth saw Jason standing there threateningly, and was very quick to say 'Let's GTFO' - if only her companion, Darren, had heeded her advice. Instead, they both bite the dust.
Friday the 13th Part VII: The New Blood: Melissa
An odd choice, to be sure, but we stan an unapologetic bitch. Melissa wears it like a mark of honor, and even has one of the most honest reactions to someone telling her about Jason - thinking it is a crazy story. Granted, he is very real, but can you blame her for not believing Tina or Nick?
Honorable mention on this one goes to Eddie - a victim of Melissa's machinations. But that has more to due with nerd sympathy than anything else.
Friday the 13th Part VIII: Jason Takes Manhattan: Colleen
There were several victims I would spare in this film, but Colleen tops the list: The kind teacher to final girl Rennie, Colleen doesn't even get the dignity of dying by Jason's hand - instead dying in a car explosion after Rennie hallucinates a kid Jason in the middle of the road and crashes their vehicle.
Honorable mention to Eva, whose death always seemed especially brutal to me (I think it had to do with how Jason threw her to the ground after strangling her) or J.J. who just wanted to play her guitar.
Jason Goes to Hell: The Final Friday: Vicki
The second Vicki on our list! She's much more of a badass though - when the Robert-possessed Jason starts murdering everyone at the diner, she quickly busts out a shotgun and also impales him with a metal rod. Not bad for a non-final girl! She also is just an all-around helpful person, and it sucks when she gets killed.
Jason X: Sergeant Brodski
Guy sacrifices himself to stop Jason and save the remaining people from the Grendel. Just an all-around badass, and one of the few characters to have a normal name.
Freddy vs. Jason: Linderman
This has more to do with the actor - Chris Marquette - being on Joan of Arcadia, than anything to do with the character. I guess there is some nerd solidarity in there, but most of my sympathy belongs to Mark. However, Mark is a Freddy victim, not a Jason one, so Linderman gets the tiebreaker.
Friday the 13th (2009 Remake): Jenna
Given the fact that most of the characters suck in the remake (a product of the tendency in the late aughts to make all of the victims assholes), Jenna is pretty much a no-brainer. While Chewie and Lawrence aren't too awful, they also don't do anything to help Clay find his sister, so Jenna gets the save. Her death was honestly shocking to me when I first watched the film, so losing that fake-out is a bit of a bummer, but again, I'd like the non-crappy character to live.
And that covers all of the films! What series should I do next?
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